According to a recent article in “Stand Firm,” which is a publication of Lifeway Church Resources, the Rolling Stones once said, “You can't always get what you want.” While the quote fit nicely with the devotion, I can't help but take issue.
You see, it wasn't the Rolling Stones who came up with those classic words. It was my Mama.
She said that way back in 1951 as I was pitching a fit for a $1.59 toy Pepsi Cola truck. The event happened during our trip to the 5 & 10 cent store.
Even after some 65 years, the particulars are etched in my mind.
“Mama, can I have this truck?”
“No!”
“Pleeeezzzeeee!”
“No!”
“Oh, come on, Mama! Pleeeezzzeeee!”
“No!”
“I'm gonna' cry and hold my breath and pitch a fit!”
“No!”
That's where the conversation ended and a bona fide fit was pitched. But it wasn't I who did the pitching. Mama made it crystal clear who was in charge of that shopping trip. It was as we left the store, my head hung in shame and humiliation, that she uttered those famous words: “You can't always get what you want.”
Words to live by, although at the time, you never could have convinced this bad tailed kid she got hold of, and got hold of good that day. Memorable sayings just seemed to roll off Mama's tongue. I didn't realize it then, but now that I've gotten older and wiser, I now see that I was in the presence of greatness.
Can anyone picture an English rock band the likes of the Rolling Stones coming up with anything original in the classic sense of the word?
How could they have grown their signature longish, nasty hair, gotten the younger generation all in a flurry about the “square-ville” status quo in society, and still had enough time to think about coming up with a saying worth repeating through the ages?
It just doesn't connect, somehow.
“You can't always get what you want” is as much a classic as are David Copperfield and The Grapes of Wrath. Through many decades of child rearing, mothers have attempted to steer their youngsters toward successful adulthood by means of my Mama's philosophy of child rearing.
But, alas, things have changed radically in the world of child-rearing today. Whatever happened to the you-can't-always-get-what-you-want rule in dealing with youngsters?
Nowadays, parents of small children operate under the premise of doing things differently.
In a recent article by family psychologist John Rosemond, a young mother said, “Parents in my generation do things differently. We want our children to think for themselves, to question authority.”
Rosemond's response was, “The result: a surfeit of children who defy authority, are openly disrespectful, argue, have no respect for adult-child boundaries, and are ruled by the tyranny of their undisciplined emotions.”
In many cases, if not most, children who are reared to expect a lot of attention, to be able to express their feelings and to demand reasons for a parent's every decision grow up with an entitlement mindset. They deserve to be the top dog simply because they've always been granted the privileges of being top dog, regardless of their incorrigible behavior.
Many are the young adults who were brought up in homes where the children rule, who later have to learn the hard way that they can't always get what they want. They leave college and enter marriage thinking that they deserve the same lifestyle Mom and Dad provided, only to learn that the paycheck will not stretch that far, and that Mom and Dad have since rethought their child-rearing philosophy.
Thinking back to that life-changing day back in 1951, I can't imagine what life would have been like for me had Mama not expressed physically with a well-deserved whippin' right there in the store, as well as verbally that you can't always get what you want. Her wisdom has served me well through the years as many of my desires failed to materialize.
I have my “children should be seen and not heard” Mama to thank.
But I still have a burning desire for a toy Pepsi Cola truck.
