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Taking one for the team

Jamie Patterson Managing EditorJamie Patterson Managing EditorIt was a shameful sight in the Patterson home.
While my husband Jason and our children carried on with their nightly activities in our home, I was sprawled out in the recliner, unable to move.
With my legs propped up, I had finally found a comfortable way to sit with a big ice pack on my left knee. My pants were covered with grass stains, my knees were swollen with pain and my pride was hurting.
How did I get in this situation? I was crippled in an effort to make my children laugh.
Just one giggle, one snicker or one belly-busting laugh from my son and daughter were all I wanted. Now, I am alone in agony.
It all began with a simple afternoon game of basketball in the back yard. The weather was perfect for some outdoor time with the kids. So, armed with a variety of outside toys, we began our afternoon of merriment.
We shot a few foam missiles into the tree. We tossed the football around a few times. Our son James got a few baseball swings in. And our daughter Elsie hauled some dirt around in her brother’s bulldozer.
When it was announced that a basketball game was in order, I beamed with excitement. Anything dealing with basketball, I am ready.
As Elsie continued to throw a few “dunks” with the help of Daddy in, a healthy game of Horse was included in the mix.
James was getting a little sore at his performance, so I decided I had to do something to brighten his mood.
My grandfather always told me that laughter is the best medicine. No matter what you have to do, make them laugh. Sometimes it’s the only weapon you have.
So I aimed on making James laugh.
Running with the basketball, I noticed Elsie’s pink scooter in my path. I decided that I would “trip” over the scooter and give a dramatic tumble to the ground.
Well, it worked...too well.
Tangling my feet in the scooter, I really did fall to the ground. My knees pounded into the ground, and my entire body shifted onto my left knee.
As I remained on the ground, I managed to thrust the basketball into the air, all while giving a series of whimpers and grunts.
My trick worked because James, Elsie and James all erupted into laughter. I accomplished my goal.
But when I picked myself up from the ground, I noticed that my left knee was throbbing. Dusting the grass and dirt off me, I could see that my knee was already beginning to swell.
Within minutes, it looked like I had two left knees.
Needless to say, I had to sit down the rest of the playtime. And as the sun eased into the hills, I limped back into the house.
“Does it look bad,” I asked Jason, showing my knee off.
“Yeah, it looks bad,” he said. “I can see it swelling from here. Why did you do that?’
“I wanted to make the kids laugh,” I said, limping away to get my ice pack.
While the rest of the house ate their supper, played with their toys and carried on with their lives, I was alone in my anguish.
As James played with his trucks, I told him that I was out for the count.
“See my knee,” I said, pulling up my pant leg. “That is what I did trying to get you to laugh.
“Oh,” he said.
Oh? That was it?
I guess I will think twice before I go throwing myself into danger again to get a few laughs.
Let’s be honest here... no, I won’t.
It doesn’t matter if I walk away with bruises, bumps or even stitches. If I need to do something outrageous to make my kids laugh, I’ll just have to take my chances.
A home filled with laughter is the best place you can be.

 

Natural disasters no match for man-made

Walter Patterson Herald ColumnistWalter Patterson Herald ColumnistSir Isaac Newton was a very smart man. He gave us many scientific discoveries, but perhaps the most important was his discovery of the Law of Gravity.
This sounds simple, but “things fall down.”  If an apple, for example, falls from a tree, it always falls down.  Gravity gives order to the universe.
As a matter of fact, gravity has shaped our planet and made it what it is today. Newton was able to describe the concept of gravity and explain many scientific questions because of his discovery of this law.
Albert Einstein came along in the 20th century and took Newton’s Law of Gravity to a completely new level. Einstein gave us the Theory of Gravity.  As strange as it sounds, Einstein’s Theory is much more accurate than Newton’s Law of Gravity.  Einstein’s Theory tells us much more about our universe and how it works.  
From this theory, Einstein gave us the Theory of Relativity, and opened the door to scientific inquiry farther than it had ever been opened.  Even today, long after Albert Einstein’s death, scientist still struggle to understand the physics that this great man left behind.
Then there is the Second Law of Thermodynamics.  In the simplest of terms, this law states that “things go from a state of order to a state of disorder.”  
A hot frying pan will go from being hot to being cold if the heat source is turned off. An ice cube will go from a solid to a liquid if left in a warm room.
Scientists estimate that the universe will go dark in 300 billion years.  The stars will have exhausted their fuel supply and will begin to flame out.  Soon, our universe will be dark and “disordered.” The Second Law of Thermodynamics has had its way with the known universe.
However, “black holes” may eat us up before the Second Law of Thermodynamics kicks in. Black holes are formed when giant stars collapse on themselves down to the size of a molecule. When this happens, the gravitational pull is so strong that anything that comes in contact with the black hole will be sucked in, never to see the light of day.  A black hole would be very bad news for the earth and to our solar system.  The sun and all of the planets would simply disappear into this “master of disaster” and human kind would be no more.
But, alas, I may worry too much about “natural disasters” and, in fact, should concentrate more on “man-made disasters.” Right now, the Democrat Party is setting us up for a disaster that could destroy the United States as we know it. If the Second Law of Thermodynamics is true, and it has never been proved wrong, then our country is moving from a state of order to a state of disorder.  
Look at what is happening today.
Our economy is hanging by a thread.  We cannot continue spending money we do not have and expect to survive as an economically viable nation.  
Freedoms guaranteed by our Constitution are being systematically taken away from our citizens.  
The institution of marriage is under assault and will probably crumble in the near future.  Men will “marry” men and women will “marry” women.
The Christian faith is being discarded in favor of secular beliefs. The moral fiber that has held this country together is disappearing, and an “anything goes” attitude has gripped our people.
Politicians misrepresent the truth in order to implement their own agendas, and our news media is corrupt.  More and more people get their news from Comedy Central or Saturday Night Live than tune in to an honest news program.  Complex political concerns are never addressed, and the ruling political class does exactly what it wants.  To my knowledge, not one Democrat has stepped forward and said that it is time to solve our enormous national problems.
The Second Law of Thermodynamics is certainly an “inconvenient truth.”

 

Time to stop and smell the flowers

Jamie Patterson Managing EditorJamie Patterson Managing EditorWho needs eggs when there are flowers to be picked?Who needs eggs when there are flowers to be picked?Our daughter Elsie  only had about four Easter eggs in her basket when something else caught her attention.
It wasn’t the golden egg that is usually filled with a silver coin or green dollar.
It wasn’t a delicious chocolate bunny rabbit, complete with a giant pink bow.
It was a vibrant, delicate yellow flower among the plastic eggs in the green field.
Elsie ran right up to it, dropped her basket and took a seat right by the pretty flower.  The annual Yazoo Herald Easter Egg Hunt was nothing but a distant memory. She had better things to tend to that morning.
As the other children her age ran around the field, scooping up as many eggs as they could, Elsie sat alone with her batch of flowers. With her tiny fingers, she carefully picked each individual flower and placed them into her basket. Not shifting one petal out of place, her Easter basket resembled an Easter bouquet within a few minutes.
By the end of the Easter weekend, Elsie and our son James both had their share of eggs from the family and church hunts. So it really didn’t matter that Elsie missed out on that one hunt to stop and smell the flowers.
Looking over the photographs we took that day, it reminded me of a very special lady who I had met within the first few months of arriving in Yazoo City.
I was a new wife, soon-to-be mother, and I had just settled into my new position as reporter at The Herald, along with my husband Jason. I seemed to be fitting in just fine in my new position and new home.
I did spend a few weeks being homesick. I am not sure if it was the new territory of beginning my own family or if it was being in a new place without my family or old friends.
And then out of nowhere, I received a phone call at work with a news tip.
“Have you ever just stopped and looked at all these pretty flowers coming up all over town,” the sweet voice said, over the telephone.
Flowers? It was my first news tip about flowers.
“No, ma’am,” I replied. “I never really gave it much thought.”
“Well, come on over to my house,” she said. “Let me throw some clothes on, and I am gonna take you on a ride around town to look at them. Might even make for a good story.”
Her name was Mary Brister. And she wasn’t kidding. She wanted to show me the flowers of Yazoo.
We spent about two hours that morning, driving all over Yazoo City. With her little hands stuck tight on the steering wheel, she would point out the different varieties of blooms and other flower beds.
But it was the tiny white and yellow wildflowers that she gave the most attention to that morning.
“They don’t look like much when they are all alone, but when they grow in big bunches like that...it’s really beautful,” she said.
And she was right. It really was a pretty sight that I never paid attention to before.
I did end up writing a story about that drive. And I made it a point to speak to Mrs. Brister anytime I saw her.
Maybe she realized the impact she made on me during that drive...maybe she didn’t But from that day forth, I began to notice the flowers. It even made an impression on Jason. It was the first thing he mentioned when we heard Mrs. Brister passed away.
So when Elsie dropped everything to pick up that small yellow flower this weekend, I thought about Mrs. Brister. I thought about all the people who stop and look at the flowers.
It is a sign of rebirth, a new season. It is a reminder of what precious things God has made for us to admire.
We just have to take the time to stop and notice them.

 

Defining the “Low Information Voter”

Walter Patterson Herald ColumnistWalter Patterson Herald ColumnistI ran into a long-time friend last week, and the first thing he said to me was, “I see you have been using the term ‘Low Information Voter’ in some of your columns.  What exactly does that mean?”
“Low Information Voter (LIV) refers to anyone who does not pay attention to politics until it’s time to vote.  They usually vote with their emotions rather than with facts, and they can be anyone from a college professor to a high school drop-out.  The LIV can be rich or poor, old or young, male or female.  They just don’t have enough information about politics to make an informed decision,” I replied.
“Can you give me some examples?” he asked.
“LIV’s elected Michael Bloomberg, the mayor of New York City.  LIV’s elected Harry Reid and Nancy Pelosi.  You can throw Dick Durbin and Jay Rockefeller into the mix.”
“What about the President?”
“He is a great politician, but his policies are wrecking the country.  We can’t remain a strong, vibrant country with opportunities for all of our citizens unless he changes his policies.  Nowhere in history has socialism worked.  Nowhere!  Look at the old Soviet Union or present day Europe.  Their economies are in shambles and we’re headed there fast.”
“How can I tell if I am a LIV?”
“How about a little test?” I suggested.
“Let’s do it,” he said an eager look on his face.
Answer these questions true or false:
TF 1. The Senate and the House of Representatives are required by law to pass a federal budget each year.
TF 2. The term “balanced budget” means the same as “national debt.”
TF 3. U. S. currency is backed up by the gold we have stored at Fort Knox.
TF 4. The federal government has the right to print money.  The more money it prints, the more valuable the dollar becomes.
TF 5. The term “inflation” means that we can purchase more goods with our dollars.
TF 6. Nancy Pelosi has stated publically that “food stamps” are an economic stimulus.  Is she correct?
TF 7. Man-made global warming (or climate change) is a scientific fact.
TF 8. The U. S. Government is the source of all prosperity.
TF 9. Government regulations insure that every citizen is treated equally and that economic downturns never occur.
TF 10. The U. S. does not have a debt crisis.
TF 11. There will never be an economic collapse in the U. S. because our government can print money.
TF 12. Same-sex marriage should be approved by the Supreme Court because these individuals have no protections under the Constitution.
TF 13. Many lawmakers and economists think that our entitlement programs must be changed if the U. S. is to avoid an economic disaster.
TF 14. The Democrat Party has failed to produce a federal budget for over 4 years.
TF 15. Our children and grandchildren will have no problem paying off the national debt because our economy is sure to grow and they will make more money than their parents.
“Well, I missed 6 of your questions.  Did I pass?”
“Sorry, if you missed 3 or more, you are a LIV.  You need to study what is going on in our government and apply logic to what you see.  Otherwise, this country is in trouble.”
“Give me the correct answers to the test,” he requested, his eyes growing narrow and his voice rising.
“Numbers 1, 13, and 14 are true.  The others are false.  Let me encourage you to pay attention to what is happening in Washington.  Know what your elected representatives are doing, and ask questions.  Only the people can stop this mad dash to economic collapse, and once you know the facts, being a LIV will just be a distant memory.  Good luck.”

 

Terrible twos disturbing the peace

Jamie Patterson Managing EditorJamie Patterson Managing EditorThe Patterson home has entered new territory. It is a place that is hard to recognize. We are confused and unsure of how we got to this point. But the only thing we can do is buckle up and hang on for the ride.
We have entered the “terrible two” stage with our daughter Elsie. Despite all what we heard before from parents who knew better, her “stage” seems more dramatic than it was with our son James.
Our son James was a fireball from birth. He always did things his own little way. He was a difficult sleeper, a picky eater and constantly full of energy.
That was just who he was.
I hate to admit this now, but when James entered into his own terrible two stage, it was really no different than before. The tantrums may have lasted a little longer and would begin a little sooner. But for the most part, my husband Jason and I were pretty well adjusted to James’ mood swings by then.
But Elsie’s transformation came out of left field.
She came into this world with a smile on her face and a calm, pleasant attitude. She rarely cried and went to sleep instantly in her own crib when we brought her home.
She was never a picky eater and always had a wonderful appetite. She played well with others. She never really threw a tantrum. And for the most part, could be calmed down easily with a kiss and hug.
But as we come around this new bend, things have gone insane. Jason and I are more baffled than ever, scratching our heads as to what has happened with our sweet little girl.
When Elsie enters the room, she struts. Yes, she makes a grand entrance. With her little hands on her hips, she arrives with an air of confidence that she is in charge.
And this little firecracker demands respect. When things don’t quite go her way, she will even cross her arms and turn her nose up in the air.
I never thought she would do it, but she has even resorted to falling flat on her stomach in the middle of a tantrum. With all four limbs extended, she shoves her little nose into the ground as she makes her case.
When James pushes her buttons, Elsie will point her finger at him and mumble an incoherent language that only babies understand. I am not sure what she is saying to him, but it can’t be good.
And let’s not forget “the dead weight” drop. It never fails. A tantrum always seems to begin while we are in the middle of the grocery store. Elsie will go from being excited about the strawberries I put into the cart to being furious because I wouldn’t let her knock cereal boxes off the shelves.
And then she falls to her knees. As I grab her arm to try to regain control, she puts all her weight into this massive drop to the floor.
People probably feel sorry for us as I try to throw the Kool-Aid packs in the cart while dragging a screaming child down the aisle.
In reality though, the terrible two stage isn’t that bad. As a parent, I think you gain more patience with each child. When James did the “dead weight” drop as an infant, I would leave our shopping cart and run to the car, shielding my face.
But with the second child, I keep on shopping with a child hanging onto my leg with tears of anguish running down her face.
I have even been known to carry on a conversation with another mother as both of our children cried over grabbing a box of Little Debbie snacks.
Elsie is going through a major change in her life, and tantrums and other dramatic episodes can be expected. She is after all a girl...a girl who knows what she wants.
Even at 31 years old, I find myself crossing my arms, stomping a foot and leaving a room with my nose in the air from time to time.
Jason and James are getting used to the antics of a female. And like most men, they stay in their recliners with a remote in hand and a confused look on their faces.
Whether it be a two year old mad because she can’t get extra cupcakes or a grown woman upset because those shoes didn’t come in her size...Jason and James know how to handle any situation.
Even at five years old, James has already learned from his father  to just nod his head and remain quiet.
This too shall pass.

 
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Letters to the editor

Dear Editor:
In the 6 April 2013 edition of The Yazoo Herald you published a letter from Cynthia Fuller, "Thanks to (Van) Foster for helping get bridge replaced."
After reading this lettter, I had the impression that the bridge was completed and traffic was moving along normally.  
Wrong!  Last Sunday I was on my way to homecoming at Providence Baptist Church.  I turned north onto old 49 and saw the signs that the bridge was out.  I assumed that they hadn't gotten around to removing the signs.  I expected to cross Thompson Creek on the new bridge.  When I approached the creek the road was barricaded and construction equipment was down in the creek.
Perhaps The Herald can keep us updated as to the progress being made on the new bridge.

Nan Harvey
Jackson, MS

glo-baker

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